ENGLAND CELEBRATES ST GEORGE'S DAY IN TRADITIONAL STYLE

Yep, this will be about the average celebration today in honour of England's patron saint.
On St Patrick's Day people who don't have an ounce of Irish blood in their bodies wear enormous green hats, cover themselves in clover and drink Guinness until they drop.
On St George's day a few old white people in twee villages in Buckinghamshire bake cakes and make tea, and a couple of rugby clubs do a two-for-one offer on a pint of English bitter.
It doesn't exactly, er, rock.
I'm not sure why no major sponsor (let's face it, Guinness sponsor the Irish one worldwide) has bothered trying to market St George's day to the English.
Possibly because the English flag (that's the white one with a red cross on it) has long been owned in this country by football hooligans and, oddly, people who like Nazis.