CON-FICTIONERY#2

In a bid to compete with the popularity of celebrity magazines, in a new series exclusive to English Ranter, we go inside the homes of some of the world's most famous sweets.
Today: A jelly baby goes horse riding
Whoa there boy! Is that rider old enough to be aboard such a feisty steed? Indeed he is. For this is no ordinary rider.
And that's no ordinary horse.
It belongs to yellow jelly baby (try calling him yellow in the flesh, and he'll smack you), one of the famous jelly baby clan.
Jelly babies are taught from an early age - indeed while they are still babies, to do stuff like ride horses, shoot guns, and make a warming fire from just two coloured crayons and glue.
These key survival techniques have preserved them as a species, despite barely being two inches tall and made of, well, jelly.
Tomorrow: When a jelly baby has twins.