CON-FICTIONERY#4

In a bid to compete with the popularity of celebrity magazines, in a new series exclusive to English Ranter, we go inside the homes of some of the world's most famous sweets.
Today: Bertie Bassett enjoys the sunshine.
Because it doesn't happen every day, a sunny day in Britain is all the more welcome, even if you are a sweet. Sweetie king Bertie slaps on a little bit of SPF 15 and heads for his deck chair, which strangely matches his carpet. These sweet millionaires eh? Very eccentric.
Tomorrow: No more dumb-ass sweet stories.
No sweets were harmed in the making of con-fictionery. And no, I didn't spend ages making these freaky little scenes either. All photographs were taken in a sweet shop window in Rye, Kent, where the owners obviously know how to sugar rush.