EUROPE'S ANIMALS ARE FUCKED SAY WORLD WILDLIFE FUND (ESPECIALLY IN POLAND)

Actually, they didn't use that language precisely. But still, the WWF and indeed the European Union have come down hard on Poland after the country has pissed in the wind at efforts to preserve Europe's endangered species.
But what's even more disturbing than Poland's couldn't-give-a-toss attitude are the WWF figures on Europe's wildlife. When I was a kid, which despite now being 40 wasn't that long ago, it was the tiger, whale and possibly elephant that you had do worry about. Not any more according to the WWF.
They estimate that 50% of all of Europe's mammals face extinction and are now endangered, while the figure is 33% for fish, reptiles, amphibian and plants.
When 15 new countries including Poland joined the EU, a project called Natura 2000 was set up to preserve 18% of the land in them so that economic expansion didn't destroy wildlife.
While less than a fifth of land doesn't sound like a lot, the Polish prime minister Jaroslaw Kaczynski moaned this week: "it is practically impossible to build anything because of Natura 2000". Which sounds unlikely. Poland have set up just 70 of the 142 protected sites that was asked of it, and has failed to protect 85% of the ones it has set up.

ONE IN THREE HEATHROW FLIGHTS CANCELLED DUE TO BOMB PLOT

At least someone's doing something about global warming.

MEL GIBSON ADMITS HE ACTED LIKE A CUNT

Ok mate, enough about your career. Now what about this Driving Under the Influence charge and your drunken nazi beliefs?

WHILE I WAS AWAY THIS PICTURE I SENT IN TWO MONTHS AGO APPEARED ON 25PEEPS.COM

Can't understand why I only lasted three hours.

K DOESNT WOR ON MY EYBOARD

And they said I'd run out of ideas.

MID LIFE CRISIS ENDS IN MONTH LONG PARTY

Thank god they're both over. Sorry I've been a while. And now I'm 40.